Monday, July 19, 2010


Facebook is awesome. It really is. But there is one little thing that I didn't recon on.

People can find you.

I don't know how on earth or why, maybe she was just thinking of people she used to know and did a search to see if I was on, since I used my maiden name in my name thing.

I got a message the other day from a girl asking if I was the Michelle who used to live in Del City, Oklahoma. I replied yes, checked her profile to see if I could get more information on who she was, discovered that we know some of the same people. People I hadn't thought of in years. Like my 8th grade boyfriend, his best friend who was the biggest sweetheart, and the girl I used to switch 2nd and 3rd chairs with every few weeks - depending on who had practiced the music the most for that chair test.

But who was she? Where exactly did I know her from? The name was very familiar, the face vaguely so.

Turns out she went to my elementary school, and was in the 6th grade band with me. (I was such a loser that I did band at recess. Mostly because I didn't have anyone to hang with at the playground except the occasional special ed kids. I would just sit on a bench and talk to myself. Not something I like to think about.) She went to the Jr. High I did for a year. She came to my house after school sometimes and went to a scavenger hunt with me at church once.

I asked if she lived a few streets down from me and had moved down to Texas. Because if she did, she's the one that randomly called a few months after moving there and said some really mean things while laughing. Things that still hurt because I had considered her a really good friend, we had slumber parties on the trampoline and everything.

What do I do if she wants to friend me? Do I call her out on why she did that? I just don't know. Perhaps it had been a game of truth or dare? Perhaps she doesn't even remember the incident at all. Maybe she remembers and feels badly about it. Am I stupid for still being upset about it 15 years later?


Karen said...

Don't waste time and energy being upset about it. If she wants to be a friend, maybe now is the time. If she's still mean, you can block her from your page. Life is too short to waste on negetive feelings. We already don't have enough time to do all the good we need to do.

Sarah said...

Ooh, that's a toughie. My rule is simple...if I'm genuinely interested in reconnecting with them or seeing where they're at now, I'll add them. If I don't know anything beyond their name and could care less about what they're doing I don't.

As far as the mean stuff she did in junior high, I wouldn't hang onto it. I think about all the stupid things I did in order to impress "friends" and really hope that people don't hold those things against me. I have obviously grown up since then!

Rachel H. said...

I second Sarah...

to a T.

But remember that it's possible you have hurt someone here and there too, and it would probably be crushing to not be forgiven because of something you did that hurt someone else--especially so long ago. Just remember that when you decide whether or not to let it all go...